MINDSET – Road Less Traveled
Manifest Well with Spiritual Teacher and Best-Selling Author Gabrielle Bernstein
By Lashaun Dale
“Joy is the ultimate creator.” These words flow easily out of new mom, author and spiritual mentor Gabrielle Bernstein’s mouth and directly into the hearts and minds of millions. Over the past 14 years, Bernstein has achieved happiness in both her personal and professional life. A noted motivational speaker and New York Times best-selling author, Bernstein also shares transparently about her own personal journey, both the strife and struggles, as well as the sweetness that can be found on the other side of surrender. Bernstein married portfolio manager Zach Rocklin in 2014, who is now her business partner, and the couple welcomed their first child, Oliver, eight months ago.
The author of seven spiritual self-help books, Bernstein, 39, serves as a personal coach and soul sister to those who want to tap into their spirit and achieve true happiness. Through her speaking engagements, social media presence, and online courses and community (gabbybernstein.com), Bernstein inspires millions to embrace personal growth and step into their higher calling—in work and in life. Yet she admits her work as a spiritual teacher only began after her own life took an unexpected turn, causing her to reclaim her spiritual faith.
“In my 20s, I ran my own public relations business and hit the party scene most nights,” Bernstein says. “I was living according to the outside world’s perception of me, and I suffered a lot with addiction.”
At 25, Bernstein realized she harbored unhealthy addictions to work, alcohol and drugs, and she set out to rebuild her life. Through her studies of “A Course in Miracles”—a metaphysical text that emphasizes relinquishing fear in all areas of life—combined with Kundalini yoga and meditation, Bernstein emerged as an improved version of her former self.
With vulnerability as her superpower and a mindset of deep service to her readers, Bernstein delivers a rare combination of spiritual insights and practical advice with each new book, deck, event or offering. In her latest book “Super Attractor” (Hay House, 2019), Bernstein offers readers tips on how to co-create the life they’ve always wanted. Her intention of the book, she says, is to “inspire you to be in the moment and have fun and feel good—and then to use that feeling-good energy to bring more healing to the world and, yes, attract more of what you desire, but most important, be a better energetic being in the world that needs that energy now.”
We asked Bernstein to tell us more about her new book and the evolution of her practice, and here’s what she had to say.
What does it mean to be a Super Attractor?
Being a Super Attractor means that what you believe is what you’ll receive. It doesn’t mean you haven’t faced challenges but rather your struggles have provided you with opportunities for growth and healing.
As a Super Attractor, you align your energy with the presence of feeling good, and as you align with that good energy, you begin to super-attract. You can put your intention into creating something, and you’ll feel supported in the creation of it. We’re always attracting, but we might not be attracting the things we want if we’re not in alignment with feeling good. The more we focus our attention and energy on feeling positive, the more we attract those things we genuinely want to experience in our lives.
Another lesson in your book is the idea of doing less and attracting more. Can you explain that concept?
The first step is to say out loud whatever you want to call into your life and then write down in a journal how you feel when you say it. If you feel hopeful and excited, you’re on the right track, but if you feel nervous or fearful, then there’s a misalignment and you need to shift your energy with a simple affirmation such as, “I welcome infinite possibilities and I’m open to receive.”
The daily practice of surrendering your plans to a higher power will help you cultivate your ability to be still and embrace the present moment. You’ll experience immense relief, a drop in anxiety and a surge of energy as you stop pouring all your mental, emotional and even physical effort into pushing, controlling and trying to make things happen.
What obstacles do people typically face as they work to create the lives they really want?
Fear, anxiety, feelings of unworthiness, past belief systems that we have on repeat and have been afraid to release because we use them to stay safe. They offer us a false sense of safety, with the need to control outcomes and time. Controlling energy, in particular, is a huge block to our Super Attractor power. So this book is really about undoing those blocks and establishing new patterns so you can start to release those obstacles holding you back and receive a lot more.
You talk about developing appreciation as a habit. Why is this important?
When you get into the flow of appreciation, you want to create even more momentum behind it.
The more we appreciate what we have, the faster we create and attract what we really want. So if you’re not happy with your body weight and you’re focusing on how unhappy you are, making lasting changes is going to be challenging. But if you appreciate your body the way it is right now, you’re bringing a more empowering energy to the process of getting in shape and losing weight while also setting yourself up for long-term success.
When life gets busy and your day becomes chaotic, is there a practice you use to quickly reset?
Yes, in my new book, I write about a three-step practice called the Choose Again method, which helps you redirect your energy and slow down the flow of negativity. There’s a lot of meditations throughout the book, and the more I meditate, the more tuned in I am. I also practice the Choose Again method throughout the day.
The first step of Choose Again is to recognize your misalignment. If you’re feeling stressed out and anxious, begin by asking yourself, “What am I thinking and how is it making me feel?” And then the next step is to actually forgive yourself for feeling misaligned. If not, you hold on to the past and stay stuck in the negative pattern, no matter how hard you try to pivot.
The third step is to choose again, and that’s simply the practice of reaching for the next best-feeling thought you can access. This is sending a prayer to the universe that you’re ready to feel good and surrendering your thoughts to a higher power. My practices are nondenominational, and praying doesn’t have to mean kneeling beside your bed and talking to God. It can be inviting a higher power to take the lead.
Why is meditation so important?
A devotional practice of being still allows us to feel a connection we wouldn’t otherwise experience because we’re moving too fast. We have to slow down in order to reconnect, and there’s meditations in my book that guide readers and encourage them to really tune in and slow down.
Expect to feel relaxed and get out of that fight-or-flight state. Maybe it’s the feeling that you have after a long run or great exercise—but to get into that place more often. And then, the more you’re tuned in, the more you’ll start to feel more synchronicity show up in your life. You’ll also begin to feel a greater sense of connection and to feel inspired.
The more we commit to that connection, the more we will really feel that greater sense of alignment start to show up in our life, and it will become undeniable.
Can I take a typical mundane moment of my day and wake it up?
You can be present in any moment. So cooking for me is meditative. My intention when I cook is not just making a nourishing meal but to get out of my head, to have something else to focus on. Now [my intention] is to teach because I have an 8-month-old son. He sits next to me in his highchair, and I am literally teaching him how to cook. I don’t know if he’s taking it all in, but he’s watching intently. So my intent now is to teach, is to be with my son, is to be creative and to really release the stories that I might have been obsessing over that day.
How does fitness and health matter?
It’s definitely important. In Kundalini yoga, we do a daily practice of sadhana. It’s usually early in the morning right before the sun rises, and it includes a lot of physical exercise and movement and stretching before the deep, long meditation. Physical exercise prior to sitting in meditation can really amplify the meditation because you’ve allowed your body to move enough and get the stagnation out—and also have fun! The more fun you have with your workout and the more you enjoy the process of witnessing your body change, the sooner your body will catch up.
Our mind has a major effect on our physical. Psychosomatic experiences are no joke. If we think every day, “I can’t lose the weight, I can’t lose it,” we’re not helping ourselves with the weight. But if we’re having fun with it, it becomes a whole new thing. When I was six weeks postpartum, I was probably 15 or 20 pounds heavier than I am right now. It was super fun for me to get back into my body and make exercise a commitment. And then at that stage, I was exercising an hour to two hours a day, way more than I ever did in my life—and enjoying every minute of it.
So the more we appreciate what we do have, the faster we create what we really want and we attract what we really want. So if you’re not happy with your body weight and you’re focusing on how unhappy you are with your weight, you’re likely not going to change your body weight very quickly or you will [change] and then you’ll go right back to the old body weight. Whereas if you’re appreciating your body the way it is right now while you’re on the journey of getting in shape and losing weight, you’re really bringing a much more empowering energy to the process, which will be sustainable and will help you keep that weight off or achieve the dreams you have for your physical body.
So many people today feel alone and isolated or anxious and stressed. What would you say to someone who may be facing obstacles like this?
We can pray for the strength to move through things, and we can focus on the intention to find healing solutions.
There are many ways. Throughout my day, I love to tune in and might say, “I choose to judge nothing that occurs.” And I just release that judgment of the situation. A prayer could be as simple as, “I claim my happiness and well-being today.” Or asking for guidance. “Thank you, universe, for guiding me to heal this condition, or feel good in my exercise, or stay on this healing path.”
When you practice the principles like the ones in my book, you’ll deepen a sense of your intuition, and that will wake you up to directions you may have never thought were possible or may have never identified were yours. When you focus on feeling good, really feeling good, you’ll realize it’s possible for you to accomplish bigger things in the world—anything from having a child to starting a business to making an impact in your local community.
Once you accept that you’re a Super Attractor, life will become magnificent. You’ll feel joyful, inspired, purposeful and empowered. You’ll no longer feel the need to control, compare or push, and you’ll settle into a sense of ease. Best of all, you’ll become a powerful example for others—and you’ll vibrate at such a high, loving frequency that your energy will be felt far and wide. You will learn to live your life to the fullest, feel great doing it, and contribute in service and love of others. When you raise your energy, the world will rise up with you.
In Super Attractor, Gabby lays out essential methods for manifesting a life beyond your wildest dreams. This book is a manifesto for confidently claiming your desires. Discover how to do less and attract more! Super Attractor releases September 24, and is available for preorder now.
Video credit: Courtesy Gabrielle Bernstein
Photo credit: ENDY YALOM, CHLOE CRESPI, TODD PLITT, GABRIELLE BERNSTEIN